This is Life!

Life is complicated yet simple.

Some things can't escape, like work, money, friends and love.

Yet it's not as simple as just work, money, friends and love.

I feel stress, angry and frustrated recently... Easily annoyed, and upset. Had nightmares too often... and I don't know why.

Could it be work? Maybe but I am sure not totally. My mind is thinking alot, and these few weeks I have changed in certain ways. More sure of what I want, and despite the frustrations I felt at times, I feel strong and positive. I thank these to my colleagues and my job... It's pushing me to strive for better life and a better me.

I realised, love needs effort. No matter how stable, things gets cold or change on and off... Need to take a look at the relationship and make efforts... If it is love, it is worth it.

I realised also real love is unselfish.

Nun jun is unselfish. He does alot of things which maybe others can't understand, but I know it's to make me happy. It seems silly but actually it's b'cos he just want me to have what I want, what makes me happy. I'm really touched at times.

Jian feng at times is unselfish too. He does not want to eventually 'get' me, like what normal guys will want, But he just want to be by my side to care for me, to see me, to be my best friend... although he loves me, he just want me to be happy with the guy I love, which is not him.

What is it about me actually? Hahaha... sometimes really wonder... so many prettier gals out there... what makes them willing to be fools for me? :p

And tomorrow I going genting with JF...Hope it will be fun! Take the stress temporary off me pls!!

I will miss all my buddies, my gd friends... my dear dear... my aiai... must miss me wor! wait for me to be back on tues! Muack!

I'm Back~

Sorry guys~ I know it's been long since I update my blog, and left you guys with nothing much to read.

Well, I realise something... For someone people, in times of sadness will tends to blog more... When happy, forget 'bout blogging... Haha... and that's me maybe... I almost forget 'bout it.

But I'm back! Recently was good, was fun. Just came back from my diving trip with Michael. Will upload the pics next time! That trip was relaxing and it's the first time I went overseas with Michael. It's really much more enjoyable than the previous time I go diving... :)

Now I feel like I'm taking a trip down memory lane. Too long never blog and now recalling what has happen recently...

Last last week.... went to my colleague's wedding, as a 'sister'. I wore a Cheong Sum... haha... Looks like a total babe wor~ Haha~

Last wed, went Zouk! Miss that place! Fun Fun Fun! I dance till crazy... Very happy night... Love you guys... Apple, Sher, Jac&Stephen, WenWei, Jian Feng and Michael... And was so happy and surprise that Jianfeng came... He don't club at all de... Hehe... And he is been a total sweetie recently...

When I came back from Tioman on Sunday... Jian Feng, Apple and Rofino was there to meet me... And I think it was Jian Feng who contacted them... Sweet of you boy! Really happy to meet up with you guys that night...

'We' are closer n closer... Sh**... I am scared man... Feels like I'm not in control... might be feeling more than I want to... It feels like my inner fire is on flames duh....

He asked me why I refused to answer his call again just now... I don't know! Sh**! Not like he did something wrong... But I feel out of sorts...

Tonight going for a run... Whew~ Suddenly feel like meeting Apple instead...But I promise him le...Sigh~ like no time for some friends... Am I been too busy for them? SoRRy Guys!

p/s buddies... next week mid-night cycling kk? sorry everytime postpone for me....

Dear... need time alone with you! If not we going to be like miles away le.... Wed club kk?

为何心情总是起起落落?
为何总是一笑而过?
为何人总是那么脆弱?
难道是因为怕受伤害
而让一切错过?
~好无耐~

I am Strong

I am strong,
my tears stubbornly refuse to fall.
I never cry,
those are just sadness releases from the eyes.


Lots of things happened...

I hope they are ok already...

Sometimes silent tears means so much more...

I went out after meeting with wen wei they all just now...

I met up with someone...

So scared now... Nothing big happened... but was quite big to me... So scared so sad...

Who can give me a hug and say everything is ok?

Sigh... Silly me... nobody will be always around... I should have known that by now...

I need to sleep... Don't think...

Visions of Mine

~Enmeshed in the fake world of reality~

Awaken from a bad dream.

Last couple of days clear my mind a little.

绕了一圈, 我们还是做回好朋友。

好多天的不愉快，我的固执，要他放弃。那天在Wen Wei 家打完麻漿后，他还在楼下。之前我们吵了又吵，我真的很累。上他的车原本是想回家休息的，到最后却去了东海岸。

结果他让我答应原谅他，我们的确变的和以前一样有说有笑。我只希望他会做到他说的，希望真的会开心。

What is reality?

Everyone's reality exist in their own mind. What I see as truth may not be what you see.

Only can follow and believe one's own reality.

My reality now is my relationship with Nun Jun is great, my friendship(or whatever u call it) with Jian Feng is ok le, the big problem now I have is my career. Full of uncertainty.

What do I do to be really happy without depending on anyone?

最大的寂寞是当发现，连想也不敢想自己心中的他！

Happy Anniversary!

Together ever since then, 3rd Jan 2005.

Our anniversary! Exactly 2yrs and 8mths already!

Look, both of us look so different! Much cuter last time...

Haha... But now more ladylike and more Man for him!

Time flies~ I'm so happy that our relationship lasts so long. I know if it continues, most properly he will be my future half. In so many ways, he is great. Totally nice. Unselfish, easy going, nice temper, dotes on me, humorous, sporty, adventurous, fun loving and generous. But, I'm worried. Do I really want to be so fixed to a guy right now? Will he be able to fulfill the material needs of mine in future. I know the kind of life I'm going after, and I don't want to short change myself. I am willing to comprise but the difference of my ideal and what I get can't be so big right?

Must have faith! Ya, I must believe in him. I am going to keep thinking this way. Because we are young, and he is a crazily smart guy! :p

是你让我相信爱情是无私，好无压力的。。。

不管发生任何事你总是让我开心让我笑, 谢谢!

Crazy Birthday

Forgot to upload these photos... 20th Aug, my birthday!